tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until after it graduates from

medical school.

Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink? A: Alcohol interferes with their

suffering.

Q: Have you seen the newest Jewish-American Princess horror movie A: It's

called "Debbie Does Dishes".

Q: Why do Jewish Mothers make great parole officers? A: They never let

anyone finish a sentence.

Q: What's a Jewish American Princess' favorite position? A: Facing

Bloomingdale's

When the doctor called Mrs. Liebenbaum to tell her that her check came

back, she replied, "So did my arthritis."

Q: Where does a Jewish husband hide money from his wife? A: Under the

vacuum cleaner.

Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? A: (Sigh)

Don't bother, I'll sit in the dark, I don't want to be a nuisance to

anybody.

Short summary of every Jewish Holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's

eat.

Did you hear about the bum who walked up to the Jewish mother on the street

and said, 'Lady, I haven't eaten in three days.' "Force yourself," she

replied.

Jewish telegram: "Begin worrying. Details to follow."